Letter to my Forever

"I, Matt, choose you Kelsey.

Loving what I know of you,

trusting what I do not know yet.

I will respect you as a partner and an equal.

I promise to laugh with you when times are good and endure when they are bad.

I will always adore, honor and encourage you.

You are my best friend and I will love you always.

Together...forever."

"I promise we will fight.

I promise I'm not going to be perfect in any area.

I promise I will make mistakes on the farm, in the house and in our marriage.

However, I also promise that I will say I'm sorry for the mistakes I make, ask forgiveness for the wrongs I do and tell you I love you everyday.

I promise to try to be the best wife that I can be for you because...

I will always love you even when I don't like you."

365 days later, the words are more true now than they were then. 

8760 hours ago you placed our wedding band on my finger that I haven't taken off since then. Every hour of every day since then I can look at my finger and remember the beautiful wedding we had, the promises we made and the love we share. 

525,600 minutes ago we were celebrated and loved at our reception for the first time as Mr. & Mrs. Matt Pagel.  

In one years time, we have traveled through 14 states and been to Washington D.C. We've started learning how to live with each other. You've dealt with my meltdowns, I've picked up your socks that you refuse to pile together and we have completed the first year of the rest of our lives. 

My dear Matt, I want you to know that I love you more than words can describe. No matter how much you think I don't. I really really really really do. I know I'm an emotional over reactive mess, I know I make you miserable sometimes, I know that I make demands on you and create stress for you that you don't need, but I love you. 

I love that you love me. I love that you put up with me. I love that you pretend to like my cooking even when you really don't. I love that you work so hard to provide a good life for us, even though I yell and nag at you about working too hard a lot. I love that you're a person I'm proud to call mine and wouldn't trade you for anybody. I love that we got married in the middle of harvest season and took a week long honeymoon afterwards. I love that I'm your number one above all else in your life. I love you for letting me get a dog and letting her be in the house. I love that you can make me smile even when I'm furious with you. I love how much you've taught me how to do in the past year. I love that you think I'm capable of so many things I'm not. I love you.

I'm so glad that I have to pick up your socks all the time because that means I'm spending my life with you. I'm glad I have to put your dishes in the dishwasher because it means that I'm married to someone that can feed himself if he has to (which he doesn't have to because his mom is too good at taking care of him) and that we have food in our refrigerator, freezer and cupboards to eat whenever we want. I'm glad that I have to complain about not having the yard mowed because that means that we have a house and yard to care for. I'm glad that I have to yell at you about spending time with me because it means you're involved in an occupation that you love and one that is feeding the world. I'm glad that you leave your boots right in front of our door that I have to push out of the way so I can get in the house because it means that you're home in our own house safe and sound.

In conclusion, I'm so happy that last October 12th was much more beautiful outside then this one. I'm so blessed to have gotten the wedding of my dreams. Every part of it was special to me and love that we got married in my Grandma's hayfield in the month that both her and my parents got married in. I'm blessed that we got to take a week long honeymoon in the middle of harvest. I'm blessed to have you, my love.

You will make me mad again. I will make you mad again. Maybe even today, but I can't imagine living our lives with anyone else. You are my first and last, you are the love of my life and you are my Forever.

I love you and Happy first Anniversary sweetie. May we have many many many more together.